Dear Debbie Advice!

mazel tov.

Anonymous: Okay well back in January me and my boyfriend broke up because of the fact we never saw each other anymore,and back in April we started "Talking" again and it may that ended because of the fact that he was too into this other girl and I didn't want to wait around for him to get over her,and now that he's over her,and he has a car so we can see eachother whenever now,I wanna be back with him. He's pretty much everything to me. and there's just one problem. He's a junior,and I'm a freshmen. and last year we did go to different schools but this year I'm going to a school across town because that's the only school in my county that offers a law academy at there school,and I got accepted and now i'm stuck going there and he's going to be at a whole different school across town,and So i'm not sure what i should do about us dating.

first of all, i am sorry, there was never a message notification and i just happened to click on messages by accident today, so i hope you see this!

have you ever talked to him about trying to date again? if you really care about him, and he cares about you, i’d say give it a shot! just because you’re in different schools, it doesn’t mean you’ll never see him! you said he has a car now, so you can see each other. and how do you know about this other girl? did he or anyone else ever say anything to you? i’d say, just talk to him about your feelings and see how he feels. you’ll never know until you talk to him about it!

Anonymous: hello, Debbie :) it's my first time to tell someone about my love story. I'm sorry if my english was sucks.

let's start it!

I fall in love with my senior at my college since last year. First of all, I do nothing because I don't have courage to tell him. I just become friend with him on Facebook. I saw his profile everyday. And someday, I just he was in a relationship with another girl. I was so hopeless. And I decide to forget him.

BUT, after couple weeks, they broke up. And he was on last semester, so I take up my courage to text him first. I know I look like slut. But, in my mind at those time, I want he know about my feeling. Then, we become close.He always tell me everything,about his private problem. We're dating too. it's nice progress, right?

but, one night, in our convertation, I was tell him about everything. About my feeling, what kind of relationship we have? and anything. He tell me sorry because he 'hanging' me. And he will think of it. After 3 days, he tell me, he cant be my boyfriend, he doesnt want to have a girlfriend right now because he not sure about his feeling. He just want to be friend. He tell me to find another man ( oh really?).

I feel so sad. I know I already said about all my feelings. I'm totally loser. I tell someone how I really love him. But he doesnt love me too. After all this time. I know letting go is the best right now. But, looks like I dont want to open my heart again. Maybe I will become old-alone lady. I feel like doll. My heart so empty. What should I do?

don’t let one heart break ruin love for you! everyone deals with rejection and getting their heart broken. and it’s a good thing for you to move on, you don’t want to miss your opportunity with the right person for you! it was good you told him your feelings, don’t be ashamed of that, courage like that is very admirable. you gave it your best shot, and he  didn’t feel the same way, but don’t worry about it! there’s somebody for every person, and he just wasn’t your man!

Anonymous: Dear Debbie, This is the person from the blog about wanting to be a girls best friend but she was to blind to see that. Yeeah, I don't want to be anything but her best friend. I hung out with her for about two weeks staright, and i was there for her for just about everything and stuff. But she went and hung out with another person for a day and all of a sudden she was like " Oh i think that she is gonna be my best friend now." And i just kinda sat there in silence cause i wanted to tell her how i felt about that, but i was afraid if she laughed or something. We used to be Really Really Close and she used to call me her best friend, and since those two weeks she hasn't even talked to me. I cry about it all the time. I Miss her and i try to tell her that all the time but nothning happenes. I need heelp with this.

you really really need to talk to her hun. tell her you consider her your best friend & you still want to be friends and you miss her. the only way things will get better is if you talk it out with her

Anonymous: My boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2 years and we love each other. We have not had sex yet thought because I wanted to wait till after senior year. Well obviously its summer and senior year is over but now im leaving for college in less than a month! i really do care about him but im not on the pill like i wanted to be. I have always been a very liberal free love kind of gal but i dont know how big a deal sex really is. Part of me thinks i should because i dont know who else i would loose it 2 and i dont wanna loose it to a random person and on the negative im afraid i will get too attached and since im going away for school we thought we would just break up. What would you do?

Let me tell you something from experience, sex is a big deal. it’s completely committing yourself and giving all of yourself to one person. it is intensely emotional, and you should only give it to someone you absolutely love. don’t just give it away to anyone, you’ll regret it. and don’t just do it because you’re leaving soon. if you guys have already said you think you’re going to break up, don’t do it! save sex for someone you’ll be in a committed relationship with, please trust me on this one!

Anonymous: Debs,

I was on holiday nearly 2 years ago, and some of my distant relatives came, they have a daughter my age so i spent a week hanging out with them and chilling. This guy (we'll call him A) came from america, hes their cousin so i also spent time with him. I knew he was older than me, i was 16 at that time but i reckoned he was like only 24. He was really nice and had fun with him. than i came back home and everything was forgotten and we never kept in touch. But not long ago his younger brother got enagaged to my cousin. so A and his parents came from america for the enagement. so at the enagement i was him again, he came up to me and we talked. and through out the night we kept talking, but i dunno, this time was different. i just felt so comfortable with him event though i barely knew him that well. and i just enjoyed his presence. but then during a conversation with a girl age came up and he told her he was 29. that was just like a bomb for me, i was liek are u 29 ??? yea was like yea.. anyways its been 3 days since the enagement and i cant stop thinking of the time we spent. Im turning 18 next week.. and hes 29... does that make things bad? he doesnt treat me like a kid, and he doesnt look 29, and he doesnt act it too, like if u see him ud think hes 25. hes such an amazing guy and id love to pursue something with him. but im just scared of the age difference. what do u think ? :(:(

i’m not so sure hun. i’m guessing you’re from a different country? long distance is tough for new couples. and the age is a little tough too. if he’s willing, then there’s no problem. first you just need to know that too. from what you tell me, i can’t tell if he’s just being nice or if he’s trying to pursue you, it’s hard to tell. any signs that tell you otherwise? let me know more details and i could tell you more.

Anonymous: Hi, I need some advice on a friend of mine. We've been talking since the beginning of the year at school. He was friends with someone I almost went out with. But, we started getting to know each other and we became closer. He texts me all the time and we hung out alot. Problem is he has a girlfriend, one that I am friends with. She is one year older than us and she attends Salisbury. She only visited every other weekend so me and my friend hung out alot when she wasn't there and it was mostly just us and maybe a few other of our friends. Well, two weeks ago we went to see the Hangover 2. I drove us there and it was just us in the car and everything is just natural with us. I like him alot but I'm hiding my feelings and just being his friend. A few of our friends came and we sat next to eachother in the movies. After the movies, we walked around our town center and then headed back to our car. I dropped him off at home and when I got home I got on facebook. I saw his latest status update that he posted right as I dropped him off. He posted: I might not show it around you, but I really wanna be with you.
My best friend called me and was like did you see Brandon's last status. She knew before I did. Everyone thinks we like each other. All the guys know he likes me. But he has a girlfriend who he apparently still loves. Now since then, she's back and I think he knows I saw this status. He barely texts me now since she's back and when he does he texts me when he's with her. He won't hang out with me now unless his girlfriend is with us. I don't know what to do now. I like him so much. But I don't think he's breaking up with his girlfriend any time soon. I'm stuck in this sticky situation. Any advice? Sorry this is so long.

This is a tough one. Think about what matters to you the most, this boy, or his girlfriend which you said is also your friend. You need to think of everyone’s feelings in this situation, not just your own. I think that that status was probably about you, but what if he was on the phone with her and wrote it about her? You never know, so don’t try to assume too much. What is your heart telling you to do? If there were no consequences, what would you do? I’m sorry I can’t tell you which road to go down, this ones for you to decide. Think about the consequences of you telling him your feelings, and think about what good and bad could come out of it. It’s your choice to make, remember that.

Anonymous: i understand that people grow apart, but my friend since i was 5 has been treating me so terribly for honestly, no apparent reason. we were so close, and ever since she started dating this guy i feel like she's been taking advantage of our friendship, thinking she can treat me this way without repercussions. i want to just stop trying to work it out but its hard when im stuck with the memory of how clsoe we were...idk what to do

Ok. Try to think of the reasons that you feel this way. What is she doing that upsets you so much? Think of logical reasons, and try to talk to her. She may not even realise she’s doing it!

Anonymous: Debbie,

My roommate from college last year is covering facebook and her blog about how I'm trying to "live her life" because I switched my major to hers (Pharmacy). Am I completely wrong in thinking that it is immature? Any suggestions? She's a southern girl with a huge temper so she's very difficult to talk to...

Thanks so much!

No you’re not wrong, that is COMPLETELY immature! I think you should honestly confront her about this! Just because you changed your major does not mean you are copying her, do you know how many people have the pharmacy major? Southern temper or not, I’d confront her.

Anonymous: Heeey Debbie(: , i have a big question that i need advice for. What should i do if i want this girl who i have been there for, for 10 years? I wanna be her best friend but she is waay to blind to see that i should be it. Whaat do i doo?!

I’m a tad confused, do you just want to be her friend, or something more? And have you ever tried just talking to her? I need a little more information for this one!